The Journals of Sylvia Plath by Sylvia Plath
Author:Sylvia Plath [Plath, Sylvia]
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3
ISBN: 978-0-307-83039-5
Publisher: Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group
Published: 2012-10-30T16:00:00+00:00
Tuesday night, November 5. Brief note: to self. Time to take myself in hand. I have been staggering about lugubrious, black, bleak, sick. Now to build into myself, to give myself backbone, however much I fail. If I get through this year, no matter how badly, it will be the biggest victory I’ve ever done. All my spoiled little girl selves cry to escape before my bad teaching, ignorant somnolence is made drearily public among my old teachers and my new students. If I fainted, or paralyzed myself, or pleaded gibberingly to Mr. Hill that I couldn’t carry on, I’d probably escape all right: but how to face myself, to live after that? To write or be intelligent as a woman? It would be a worse trauma than this, although escape looks very sweet & plausible. This way, I can build up a dull, angry resentment & feel I’m going through with it & will deserve my freedom in June, for sacrificing a year of my life. 7 more months.
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